Woohoo, that's right! It's payday!
For some people, that means all kinds of fun things. For most of us, it means it's time to get out the dang checkbook again, pay bills, watch as your money magically disappears, and then try to find some kind of satisfaction in knowing you've been a responsible adult. As if there's any fun in that. Pssht.
When it gets hot, do you know what I want to eat? A salad plate. A scoop of tuna salad, a scoop of cottage cheese, and a scoop of potato salad all on a lovely bed of fun lettuce with lots of sliced up cucumber, cherry tomatoes, and maybe a couple black olives.
Is it healthy? Erm...not so much. Too much mayo, unfortunately. It doesn't keep me from wanting one, though.
So, what's new in blog land tonight?
I hung out with my friend Kristin tonight! Yay! She's slowly introducing herself to Dr. Who.
If you know much about me, you know I'm a bit obsessed with it right now. And while I'm so glad she's starting to watch it, I also feel kind of bad for her. I've never had a show that continually rips out my soul, stamps on it a few times, and hands it back to me all damaged. It doesn't just do it once. Nope. Again and again and again- and like a fool, I keep coming back for more. I've never enjoyed being emotionally damaged more!
Honestly. At least the Daleks kill you right off. lol
Do you watch the show? If you do, who's your Doctor?
I love them all, honestly. I still think that nine's going to always be *my* Doctor, just because he's the one I got to know first. And, don't get me wrong. I love David Tennant and Matt Smith, too. I do. I haven't seen Capaldi, but likely once I've seen him, I'll love him, too. lol Eccleston will always be mine, though.
Hey, do you know what feels great?
Sitting in an 85 degree room in jeans with a baking hot laptop on your legs! Trust me, you're going to want to do this. For a long, long time. At least an hour or so.
My hubby's birthday is this weekend. He wants a chocolate cake with strawberry frosting. As Pedro might say, "All of his wildest dreams are going to come true." Regarding the cake, anyway. I'm feeling confident I can come through with the cake.
I got him a couple things off Etsy and Amazon for his birthday. Naturally the one I liked best didn't get here yet.
What do you typically do on the weekends? Our weekends typically end up with us putting an exorbitant amount of miles on my car and really doing nothing. It's pretty sad. We've driven around the state so much, there's like nothing left that's new or different to do. lol
We'll sit around and try to think of something to do that we haven't done within driving range and it's slim pickin's. There's lots of stuff down around Philly we haven't done, but neither of us are all that fond of cities or crowds, so, you know. There's a reason why we don't travel down that way much.
The crickets are chirping rapidly. While some might find this comforting, I know it means that it's hot out. Crickets chirp fast when it's warm and slow when it's cold. (Thanks to the laptop, my legs are very nearly medium-rare.)
Speaking of legs, can I rant a little on the ridiculousness of shaving your legs in the summertime? I need to invest in one of those no-no things or something. I can't stand having scratchy legs at the end of the day. It's awful.
Once in awhile a soft puff of cool air is blowing in through the screen in the porch door. When it happens, it is pure heaven.
There needs to be a convertible house built. You just undo the latches and push a button and all the rottenly hot air from the attic and second floor escapes...and the blissfully cool air from outside fills your home instead. Oh- and an insect screen slides over the open space...and you can look at the stars while you sleep, if you want! This is just getting better and better!
Oh. Or you could have central air. I guess that's an option too. I mean, it's a lot more boring than pushing a button and having the roof slide off your house, but...
Goodnight everyone. Have a lovely weekend. :)
Till next time,
Mandy
Friday, May 29, 2015
Thursday, May 28, 2015
Stuck in the house
I'd love to be outside right now. Really. The birds are chirping and soft breezes are filling the air. It's very pleasant out...but my neighbors are outside. My kind, nice, friendly neighbors...and they always say hello and we always chat but...I just want to be outside by myself. Typical. This is what happens when you grow up in the sticks and then live in a town. There's no privacy.
Have these people done anything wrong? Nope. Not at all- they're really nice. Delightful, really. But I'm Mandy, and Mandy doesn't really do the whole neighbor thing very well. I'd rather just hide in my cozy (read: roasting hot) living room and listen to them all banter about out there.
So, I'll sit here on the sofa and hope that they go in soon so I can go outside for a bit. It's really easier this way. No awkwardness, none of me trying to think of something to say or pretend like I'm bustling about and busy with something- because I'm really not.
Last night, just before 9:00, I went for a walk through town. I really like walking, but I'm constantly wondering what people are thinking when they see me. Because I'm not changing into a whole other outfit just to walk around through town.
When I walk through town with what I've already got on, I assume people think one of two things:
1. I've had a DUI and lost my license and am therefore a big trailer park loser that has to hike around to get anywhere. (This makes me want to take my keys with me- thrust forth in my fist, shaken at the skies as they proclaim to everyone, yes EVERYONE that this girl does, indeed, have her own car...and is not some hobo.)
2. I'm ashamed of myself and have to walk in the dark so no one will see me. (They're not too far off on that one. lol) Because, you know. People are cruel. I won't ride a bike for the same reason. Have you seen a gal of my stature perched on a tiny bicycle seat? It's not a pretty sight. And I refuse to be the laughing stock of the town because I'm riding around on my bike with my big giant butt perched on this tiny little seat. Nope. Ain't gonna happen.
It's funny- because it's perfectly acceptable for me to do silly or stupid things to embarrass myself- because that's on purpose. If you're just laughing at me because I'm overweight? Damn. That's just heartbreaking.
Ah, such is the life of a fat girl. lol
So, I just decided to take the laptop out back. Our yard is fenced in, and I appear to be on my own for the moment.
The church bells are going off for 8:00. It's funny how I hardly even hear them anymore. When we first moved here, it was kind of a novelty. Now it just blends in with the background noise until I'm out here alone.
The Rose of Sharon is already brimming with buds. I wish I could tell you how much I love it, but it's like...such a garbage tree. lol If you like hours and hours of tedious yard clean up, then this is the plant for you. ;)
Have you ever sat and studied a tree as it moves? Each branch sorta dances and sways on its own. It's almost like each limb is vying for attention...but it doesn't realize that the movement of all the branches together is what makes it so poetic. Is that too deep for a blog? I don't know. I'm just thinking, here.
There's a rabbit that just sneaked in under the fence. He's eyeballing me warily, but pretty intent on eating the delicious grass my yard affords him. Eat up, dude. Invite some friends. Mowing the grass was never a favorite past time of mine, anyway. lol
I had a great idea for a kid's book today while I was opening mail and processing exams. It was going to be awesome. It's rather a shame that I can't remember anything at all about it...other than it was going to be epic.
There are kids running down the alley whooping and laughing. I'm not sure what all the excitement is about, but I'm guessing you don't need much of a reason at 10 years old. Just being out with your friends on a nice night is probably reason enough.
I'm sorry that these first two posts haven't been very interesting or fun. You've sorta caught me in an off time. If you stick around, things will likely improve- I'll have more interesting things to say and probably more exciting topics than just writing about what's happening in Nescopeck. lol
Have a lovely night, everyone.
Also- if you took the time to comment on my blog, or on my facebook page- thank you. I'm primarily doing this for me, but it's nice to know that some of you are actually reading this. Hopefully I won't be a huge disappointment. lol
:) Kudos to you, my friends.
Till next time,
Mandy
Have these people done anything wrong? Nope. Not at all- they're really nice. Delightful, really. But I'm Mandy, and Mandy doesn't really do the whole neighbor thing very well. I'd rather just hide in my cozy (read: roasting hot) living room and listen to them all banter about out there.
So, I'll sit here on the sofa and hope that they go in soon so I can go outside for a bit. It's really easier this way. No awkwardness, none of me trying to think of something to say or pretend like I'm bustling about and busy with something- because I'm really not.
Last night, just before 9:00, I went for a walk through town. I really like walking, but I'm constantly wondering what people are thinking when they see me. Because I'm not changing into a whole other outfit just to walk around through town.
When I walk through town with what I've already got on, I assume people think one of two things:
1. I've had a DUI and lost my license and am therefore a big trailer park loser that has to hike around to get anywhere. (This makes me want to take my keys with me- thrust forth in my fist, shaken at the skies as they proclaim to everyone, yes EVERYONE that this girl does, indeed, have her own car...and is not some hobo.)
2. I'm ashamed of myself and have to walk in the dark so no one will see me. (They're not too far off on that one. lol) Because, you know. People are cruel. I won't ride a bike for the same reason. Have you seen a gal of my stature perched on a tiny bicycle seat? It's not a pretty sight. And I refuse to be the laughing stock of the town because I'm riding around on my bike with my big giant butt perched on this tiny little seat. Nope. Ain't gonna happen.
It's funny- because it's perfectly acceptable for me to do silly or stupid things to embarrass myself- because that's on purpose. If you're just laughing at me because I'm overweight? Damn. That's just heartbreaking.
Ah, such is the life of a fat girl. lol
So, I just decided to take the laptop out back. Our yard is fenced in, and I appear to be on my own for the moment.
The church bells are going off for 8:00. It's funny how I hardly even hear them anymore. When we first moved here, it was kind of a novelty. Now it just blends in with the background noise until I'm out here alone.
The Rose of Sharon is already brimming with buds. I wish I could tell you how much I love it, but it's like...such a garbage tree. lol If you like hours and hours of tedious yard clean up, then this is the plant for you. ;)
Have you ever sat and studied a tree as it moves? Each branch sorta dances and sways on its own. It's almost like each limb is vying for attention...but it doesn't realize that the movement of all the branches together is what makes it so poetic. Is that too deep for a blog? I don't know. I'm just thinking, here.
There's a rabbit that just sneaked in under the fence. He's eyeballing me warily, but pretty intent on eating the delicious grass my yard affords him. Eat up, dude. Invite some friends. Mowing the grass was never a favorite past time of mine, anyway. lol
I had a great idea for a kid's book today while I was opening mail and processing exams. It was going to be awesome. It's rather a shame that I can't remember anything at all about it...other than it was going to be epic.
There are kids running down the alley whooping and laughing. I'm not sure what all the excitement is about, but I'm guessing you don't need much of a reason at 10 years old. Just being out with your friends on a nice night is probably reason enough.
I'm sorry that these first two posts haven't been very interesting or fun. You've sorta caught me in an off time. If you stick around, things will likely improve- I'll have more interesting things to say and probably more exciting topics than just writing about what's happening in Nescopeck. lol
Have a lovely night, everyone.
Also- if you took the time to comment on my blog, or on my facebook page- thank you. I'm primarily doing this for me, but it's nice to know that some of you are actually reading this. Hopefully I won't be a huge disappointment. lol
:) Kudos to you, my friends.
Till next time,
Mandy
Wednesday, May 27, 2015
So, I've had blogs in the past, but...
The problem was that I was always trying to do a themed blog- and that's not really me. It never has been. I'm good at one thing- being Mandy. Honestly, it's enough of a struggle to just keep up with myself- let alone trying to portray myself as someone whose actually really good at one particular thing.
I get bored too easily for that. I tend to focus all my energy on one or two things at a time. Then, I'm like done. That's it, I've had my fill. (Wish that'd happen with food one of these days...)
So, at any rate, here we are. If you're reading this first post, you likely already know me, so you know the basics. Some people have told me I should blog, and when I used to have my old old blog, I did posts like I'll do here; just random bits and pieces of my life, writing down whatever comes to mind.
Some posts will be silly. I'm silly a lot. Some might be sorta boring. And some will be rather depressing. Because that's life, isn't it? It's a great big jumble of everything. So I'll do my best to let you wade the waters and see things from my perspective. You might like some of it, you might hate some of it. You might disagree with me, and that's okay too.
Today's not been great. I don't know how far into that I want to delve, but rest assured, some days I struggle. It's difficult, you know?
A month or so ago I weaned myself off the Zoloft I've been taking. While I'm happy that I'm no longer plagued by the side effects, I miss the nice, even feeling it did give me. I never took it for depression as much as I did for anxiety, but I'm finding that being anxious all the time allows depression to step forth. lol Boo-yah! And it's not bad all the time; most days I'm pretty good.
I wonder if you've ever dealt with it?
I wonder how common it actually is.
I realize that everyone perceives it differently. I have strong (rather irrational) fears of traffic. Busy highways, new places, anywhere with lots of people...or even some people- I'm instantly uncomfortable. If I know in advance that I have to go, it makes it all the worse. Because if you know in advance you have plenty of time to think about it. Over and over. That's the loveliness of anxiety- it's the gift that just keeps on giving, and giving, and giving and- well you get the point.
"So stop worrying about stuff. Think about something else." That's some actual advice I've received.
Not to be an ass but- that's like the stupidest thing I've ever heard. If it was that easy, I'd have done it already. ;)
I realize that to you, my fears are irrational and stupid.
But listen- I didn't choose to worry about this crap. It's just how it is. I'm dealing with it the best I can.
In the last year, I've been taking this whole aging thing rather poorly. I'm worried I'm going to live my life and never have the opportunity to do anything that seems or feels important to me.
It's not like my life is miserable- quite the opposite, actually. But I do spend most of my time doing the same things...and sometimes a gal wants a little variety. Sometimes I'd like the chance to do something fun or out of the ordinary. It just feels like I've missed the boat at 36.
I've been writing a lot lately... I like it until I read something better, then my heart nearly stops as I realize how grossly inadequate I am as a writer and I feel like utter rubbish until the next day. A bit up and down, that is. ;)
I feel like I should be writing something clever- because who is going to stick around and read this if there isn't anything clever or witty in it?
I'll likely be more clever and witty in the future. Today, it's not in the cards, and I hope that's okay.
Till next time,
Mandy
I get bored too easily for that. I tend to focus all my energy on one or two things at a time. Then, I'm like done. That's it, I've had my fill. (Wish that'd happen with food one of these days...)
So, at any rate, here we are. If you're reading this first post, you likely already know me, so you know the basics. Some people have told me I should blog, and when I used to have my old old blog, I did posts like I'll do here; just random bits and pieces of my life, writing down whatever comes to mind.
Some posts will be silly. I'm silly a lot. Some might be sorta boring. And some will be rather depressing. Because that's life, isn't it? It's a great big jumble of everything. So I'll do my best to let you wade the waters and see things from my perspective. You might like some of it, you might hate some of it. You might disagree with me, and that's okay too.
Today's not been great. I don't know how far into that I want to delve, but rest assured, some days I struggle. It's difficult, you know?
A month or so ago I weaned myself off the Zoloft I've been taking. While I'm happy that I'm no longer plagued by the side effects, I miss the nice, even feeling it did give me. I never took it for depression as much as I did for anxiety, but I'm finding that being anxious all the time allows depression to step forth. lol Boo-yah! And it's not bad all the time; most days I'm pretty good.
I wonder if you've ever dealt with it?
I wonder how common it actually is.
I realize that everyone perceives it differently. I have strong (rather irrational) fears of traffic. Busy highways, new places, anywhere with lots of people...or even some people- I'm instantly uncomfortable. If I know in advance that I have to go, it makes it all the worse. Because if you know in advance you have plenty of time to think about it. Over and over. That's the loveliness of anxiety- it's the gift that just keeps on giving, and giving, and giving and- well you get the point.
"So stop worrying about stuff. Think about something else." That's some actual advice I've received.
Not to be an ass but- that's like the stupidest thing I've ever heard. If it was that easy, I'd have done it already. ;)
I realize that to you, my fears are irrational and stupid.
But listen- I didn't choose to worry about this crap. It's just how it is. I'm dealing with it the best I can.
In the last year, I've been taking this whole aging thing rather poorly. I'm worried I'm going to live my life and never have the opportunity to do anything that seems or feels important to me.
It's not like my life is miserable- quite the opposite, actually. But I do spend most of my time doing the same things...and sometimes a gal wants a little variety. Sometimes I'd like the chance to do something fun or out of the ordinary. It just feels like I've missed the boat at 36.
I've been writing a lot lately... I like it until I read something better, then my heart nearly stops as I realize how grossly inadequate I am as a writer and I feel like utter rubbish until the next day. A bit up and down, that is. ;)
I feel like I should be writing something clever- because who is going to stick around and read this if there isn't anything clever or witty in it?
I'll likely be more clever and witty in the future. Today, it's not in the cards, and I hope that's okay.
Till next time,
Mandy
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